Caleb's 1st Birthday

So we finally made it!!  Our little one turned one last week and after learning from my mistakes of Soren's 1st birthday, I was bound to make this as stress free as possible.

Nearly 4 years ago, I was so excited for my boy's 1st birthday.  Soren had had such a tough start in life that celebrating his first birthday was just a miracle beyond our beliefs.  So of course, I decided to throw a huge party at our home to celebrate this momentous occasion.   I started planning several months in advance and wanted everything to be perfect.

But...shortly before Soren's birthday I came down with shingles.  Yes, at 27 I broke out in shingles.  Now why, you ask and how, does a 27 years break out into shingles when the average age range of shingles is 55?  Well it was because of stress.  I stressed myself out so bad with party planning, and Thanksgiving, and Christmas (Soren's birthday is December 7), and  with everything we had been through to get Soren to his 1st birthday, my body just could not keep up.   I had gotten myself so worked up over silly things that my system just said ENOUGH!

So needless to say for Caleb's birthday I tried to keep myself as calm and relaxed as possible.  I decided to to do at the park (so that I wouldn't have to stress out about my house getting dirty). I also planned way in advance making a lot of the decorations on my computer and ordering the cake and bouncer way in advance.

The day of the party had come and I realized something, it was all done.  i allowed family to help me put this together and thanks to my aunt, cousin, sister and mother-in-law the party was a huge success.  Not only because the party was a lot of fun for kids and adults but that I was able to stay relatively calm throughout the whole thing.  Yes, I had my moments of panic when it came to finding circus animal crackers at the last minute for the goody bags, but I got through it without tears (yes, folks that's how bad I used to be).

And if I could...I have to say the biggest reason for my calmness is that I realized after shingles what was really important in my life.  It wasn't the parties or how clean my house was or is, but that I focus on what blessings God has provided to John and I in our lives.  I realize that every day I trust The Lord more knowing that I will give back my children to Him (hopefully).

So remember, it really isn't about how clean your house is or how extravagant the party, it's about what you have been blessed with!

The birthday boy!

Our circus themed birthday party!

The fabulous banner Grammy made

Yes the Caleb part of the sign is off center, but really who cares in the end?

Our balloon man and our homemade bean bag toss.

From Dream Home to Practical Home

Back in 2008, John and I found the perfect family home.  In a suburb of Los Angeles, Glendale, we found a perfect 3 bedroom home built in 1929.  Character everywhere.  For the Interior Designer it was a dream come true.  For a contractor it was a dream come true.  For John and I it marked all of the qualities we wanted in a home.

Albeit the home was not move in ready.  Far from it.  This home needed a new kitchen and master bathroom.  With that said we would have to move the stairs in order to achieve the new kitchen.  Day and night John worked long hours at work to come home and work long hours on the house.  I was 5 months pregnant and staring at an entryway with plywood floors, no stairs, and a giant structural beam in the kitchen.  Trust me, there were days where I thought we bit off more than we could chew.  The funny thing is that it wasn’t the construction that caused us to bite off too much of, it was the cost of the home itself.

When we purchased the home I was working full time for a Southern California General Contractor, making a very good income.  My husband was on the up and up at his General Contracting company.  Together we were making a very comfortable income.  

Then our first son, Soren was born, our gift from God.  Soren was born only 3 weeks early but suffered from Pulmonary Hypertension and Respiratory Distress.  In other words, he couldn't breath.  His lungs were underdeveloped and was rushed off to NICU.  On day 2 the staff told us that if we believe in God to pray because our child was the sickest baby in the NICU.  Well pray we did, our Pastor drove from Oceanside to Cedars Sinai in Los Angeles.  There we all prayed for Soren to recover.  That night John and I sat in our hotel room by the hospital and prayed, and prayed we asked that if it was God’s will to take our child then to take him peacefully and to give us the strength to cope with the loss.  But it would be our deepest prayer for you God to save him and bring him to recovery.  Well that next morning the neonatologist came to us and said. ‘I’m not sure what happened last night but Soren has made a turn for the better.’  We knew right then there that God was there and answered our prayer.  It was approximately 2.5 weeks later that the neonatologist asked us if we were ready to take Soren home.  Really?  On Christmas Eve?  And that we did.  Soren came home on Christmas Eve 2008.

The reason I brought this story up related to our family home was that, we had no idea how much Soren’s medical bills would cost us.  Just one bill alone (his visit in NICU) came to $697,000.  Now granted we had insurance, but it didn’t cover the entire sum.  That next year, Soren was in and out of the hospital at least two dozen times.  Twice staying for over a week.  In 2009 we owed somewhere between $60,000-80,000.  As a couple we had not planned on these expenses.  And with the home expenses we just ate our savings.

So in 2010 we completed our remodel and realized that with me not working, we would have to scrounge to live in our home.  We became…house poor…

We loved our home very much, but you know, both John and I believe that we treated our home as an idol.  We cared more about our home than the Lord.

So in August of 2012, when our last dollar was gone from or savings, we decided to sell the house.  And you know what’s funny?  We prayed that night.  We prayed that if it was God’s will for our home to be sold that it be sold quickly.  And what happened on the Friday the listing went on the MLS?  A celebrity bought our home cash on that Monday and asked if we could be out in 8 days.  Don’t ask God a question if you are not prepared for the answer.  And the other comical aspect…our house sold for $1 less than what we paid for it.  Both John and I felt that that was God confirming that we treated the home like an idol.

Many thirty somethings don’t get their dream home.  We did, and we lost it.  But that’s okay, we had a taste of it, and the taste was nice but in the end it was not worth all the effort.  So today, we are downsizing.  We are making life simpler.  We are focusing on our children, not about the stuff.  We want our kids to know that mom and dad love them more than the stuff.

As a high school friend of mine said on her blog:"the memories we want our kids to have, we create.  We don't let it slip by. We make the memories we want them to grow old with. http://leslieautumn.blogspot.com/

So we are getting ready to embark on our new home in Aliso Viejo.  A much more modest home, but a home that we can add memories to and a place for our children to grow with other kids.  It is a beautiful home and we are so excited for this new chapter!

Joshua 24:15 “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”